Beat
|
Objective
|
Obstacle
|
Action
|
1.
|
I want to get inside the room to check on my baby,
and let Eric see her
|
The door
|
I opened the door and made my way inside
|
2.
|
I want to get in without waking my baby up
|
Eric making a noise
|
I said “Not too loud” in a scolding manner
|
3.
|
I want to show Eric my baby
|
His ignorance and lack of interest
|
I called him once, and when he didn’t turn, I called
him again until he turned. Smiled at him and introduced the man to my sweet
baby
|
4.
|
I want to show him that I’m offended
|
His inconsiderateness
|
I made a loud, somewhat angry “What” and looked at
him straight in the eye
|
5.
|
I don’t want to start a fight with him
|
He’s still being inconsiderate towards my feelings
|
I just brushed it off in a way. I put the insult
aside, and told him why I wanted him to see my baby.
|
6.
|
I wanted to get an explanation out of him
|
“What?”
|
|
7.
|
I don’t really want to get all sentimental and going
back to the past kind of thing
|
His speech-like way of saying things
|
I turned whatever he said into a joke, and laughed
it off
|
8.
|
I don’t want to start a fight with him
|
Once he rants, he won’t stop.
|
“I do not want to get into a discussion about this
now, Eric” in a stern voice.
|
9.
|
I don’t want to start a fight and wake the baby up.
I felt it’s enough that he’s already seen the baby
|
“Let’s just go downstairs”
|
|
10.
|
I want to show him that I’m offended at his remarks
|
He is still being inconsiderate
|
I raised my voice as I asked him what he meant.
|
11.
|
I want to show him that I am now living the life
that I always wanted and is now very happy
|
“Fred and I happen to be very, very happy” I also
raised my voice to show that I was offended of what he said about Fred and
Marie
|
|
12.
|
I want to hurt him like he hurt me
|
His emotional detachment, and his lack of expression
|
I made fun of the fact that he is going out with a
girl that is far too young for him and does a thesis on a stupid singer.
|
13.
|
I want to deny the fact that I was interested with
her thesis
|
The fact that he is seeing right through me
|
“Who the hell would write a thesis on Paris Hilton?!”
in a mocking tone, especially when I said Paris Hilton. I try to imitate how
Paris Hilton acts
|
14.
|
I want to make fun of him
|
“Oh she’s beautiful, she’s intelligent, she’s not
hung up by society’s rule” while imitating him on the phone
|
|
15.
|
I want to point out the fact that he hasn’t grown up
despite the age, and continue to mock him
|
“I think you should grow up”, “Why should you grow
up, are you asking me why should you grow up?” emphasis on grow up.
|
|
16.
|
I want to show that I’ve moved on and grown up of
our past relationship
|
He’s seeing right through me
|
I list down the things that people do, and stated
the fact that, that is what everyone does.
|
17.
|
I wanted to show him that I am not saddened about
the past
|
He’s seeing right through me, he knows that I only
got by.
|
I snapped back at him denying the fact that I was
going to cry.
|
18.
|
I want to deny the fact that I regret my choices. I
wanted to show him that I made the right choice
|
He doesn’t trust me
|
I swore at him, showing him how I am not happy with the
fact that he’s looking through me
|
19.
|
I finally snapped and I let out the truth of how I
am happy with the fact that he left my life
|
I growled and shouted at him, about how I made the
right choice about marrying Fred and that he wasn’t the father of my
daughter.
|
|
20.
|
I attempted to end the fight
|
He continues to mock me
|
“Let’s just spend the rest of the night playing Pictionary
alright”
|
21.
|
I want to show him that I’m offended at the fact
that he is insulting my husband
|
His ignorance
|
“Do you know how intimidated my husband is by you?”
telling him to back off.
|
22.
|
I want to mock his immaturity.
|
“Maturity-wise”
|
|
23.
|
I want to drop the subject about my marriage and
feelings
|
His persistence
|
“That’s it. I demand that you play Pictionary, Eric,
I goddamn insist.”
|
24.
|
I need to deny the fact that I don’t love my husband
|
He’s seeing right through me
|
“I never said I didn’t love him” This wasn’t a lie.
|
25.
|
I couldn’t tell Eric that I loved my husband.
|
My denial had finally reached its peak that I can’t
continue to deny anymore
|
“YOU GOT ON THAT FUCKING BOAT!” I told him the
reason why we were in this place.
|
26.
|
I want to continue to make him feel hurt the way I
did
|
“The Farmboy from Bensonhurst. You’re wasting your
intelligence”
|
|
27.
|
My last attempt to justify my choices in the past,
and to establish a higher status than him
|
“That thing you said about me regretting my choices,
at least I made a choice”
|
|
28.
|
My attempt to justify my marriage
|
His trust in me
|
“I love Fred, Eric”
|
29.
|
He needed to know the truth
|
I can’t keep denying myself
|
“But not like how I loved you.”
|
30.
|
I wanted to end the conversation and the fight
|
He seemed to want to stay
|
“Let’s just go downstairs” and I apologized for what
happened in the past.
|
31.
|
I wanted to stop him but I didn’t
|
I’m seeing him as the father of my daughter, and I
liked the view of that. I couldn’t stop him from lifting Elizabeth into his
arms.
|
“Eric, what is it?”
|
32.
|
I didn’t want to get into another fight.
|
I didn’t want to hear what he wanted to say, but he
continued on anyway
|
“You can’t dance, this is why you’re crying?”
|
33.
|
I wanted to hear his justifications
|
“How did Elizabeth made you think of that?”
|
|
34.
|
I didn’t want to take the blame of what happened
|
“I would arrange this, like I did this to you?”
Emphasis on I and a tone of disbelief.
|
|
35.
|
I wanted to know why he didn’t tell me this earlier.
I regretted my choices of marrying Fred
|
“Why didn’t you just say me you couldn’t dance?”
|
|
36.
|
I want to raise his spirit
|
He’s feeling so down
|
“Yes, you will!”
|
37.
|
I shouldn’t hold him
|
I want to hold him
|
“I don’t think so, I mean, I don’t think I would be
able to let go”
|
38.
|
I wanted to tell him the truth
|
“I believe you, I cried”
|
|
39.
|
I attempted to raise the mood. I’ve got to comfort
him.
|
“There was one time that you danced with”
|
|
40.
|
I’ve got to comfort him, give him a little bit of
hope
|
“Eric, maybe one day-”
|
|
41.
|
I’ve got to give him some positive thoughts
|
He really doesn’t like Marie
|
“I’m sure you’ll do just fine on your own”
|
42.
|
I’ve got to make up for those lost times, and I’ve
got to give him more positive thoughts
|
I went up to him, hugged him and started dancing
with him, giving him assurance that everything will be ok.
|
Thursday, 3 May 2012
Beat Sheet for Abigail Lynn
So here's the beat sheet for The Man Who Couldn't Dance, for Gail.
Labels:
journal,
life,
rehealsal notes,
theater
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